I'M BACK FROM MO'BAY

What's up fellow bloggers? I'm back from Jamaica, and wouldn't you know it's taken a turn for the cold in D.C.? Boo!

Any way, had a fab time in Jamaica for the wedding. Although, my mother and I had to make a good time because the Wyndam Rose Hall Resort and Country Club SUCKS! It's 4 stars and the reviews were good, but here's what they didn't put on tripadvior or expedia:

1. The guestrooms are not carpeted. Instead they have white tile flooring which is constantly dirty despite housekeeping's efforts. It was disgusting.
   
2. The hotel only has 3 restaurants. Two of the restaurants require reservations and are not open every day (i.e. when I went to make reservations on Thursday and on Sunday, one restaurant was closed for the day and the other was completely booked). The third restaurant is a buffet, and Traveldiva does not do buffet, especially one that reminds me of a high school cafeteria with the students being wet, scantily clad families coming in from the pool. So we ended up eating off the resort A LOT or surviving on chips and soda. HA.


3. The ATM was out of service for two days.


4. The cable t.v. stopped working right in the middle of the season finale of Desperate Housewives and did not come back on until the next day.


5. THE RESORT IS INFESTED WITH DIRTY STRAY JAMAICAN CATS. I kid you not. My mom and I were lounging on an elevated beach area the first day we were there, determined to relax and enjoy the beauty of the ocean despite our disappointment in the hotel. I happened to turn my head and see a d*mn stray cat looking me dead in the eye. It would have been bad enough if that had been the only one. No, little Garfield had a gang of friends. And they came out on the resort property every evening, by the pool, by the ocean--h*ll cats were lounging under and around tables while people ate and listened to Calypso bands in the evening. I swear cats were laying down, relaxing in the eating area enjoying a little Bob Marley. A stray cat jumped down from a food tray right in front of my mother. There were even cats walking around our tables during the wedding reception and we were afraid one was going to pounce on a cake. Never in all my years of travel have I been to a resort infested with stray cats. I checked into a hotel, not a zoo. I made my complaints known to management and will be writing a scathing review on tripadvisor and expedia.

But on to the GOOD!

I went jet skiing in the middle of nowhere. I literally flew over the water--totally exhilarating.

The wedding was lovely. I led the line dancing at the wedding reception. I also swam, chilled at Margaritaville, hung out on the hip strip and drank more frozen drinks than I can actually count. Breakfast--I'll have a peach on the beach. Lunch - I'll take a Strawberry daquiri. Snack - Two pineapple mojitos por favor; Dinner - Need I even ask?

I went to the spa--80 minute deep tissue, pedi, mani. Good times.

I climbed the Dunn's River Falls in Ocho Rios. Now, that was not deliberate. I thought I was going to be walking along a gentle path along the falls. I did not know I was going to be actually rock climbing risking life and limb up a seemingly unending waterfall for an hour. Luckily I encountered three other Black girls who were equally as petrified, and we made our way up the slippery rocks together. I honestly had to stop in the middle of the trek and pray to the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost because only the Trinity kept my behind from falling and either killing or injuring myself. Seriously, the brochure shouldn't just say climbing the beautiful falls--that sounds like a fun frolic. It should say "BEWARE--the rocks are slippery, steep, and you will fall and bust your *ss a number of times before it's all over."

MOST IMPORTANTLY - I GOT TO SPEND TIME WITH MY MOM! Isn't she cute?

I'll do more of a blow by blow of my trip to Portugal, but just wanted to hit some highlights and lowlights for ya!